My Bloody Valentine (1981)★★★☆☆

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and since I’d never seen any version of My Bloody Valentine (okay, that’s not quite true – I did see the band in concert once), I figured there was no better way to celebrate than to give it a try. While stuffing myself full of candy, of course.

So how was it? Eh, it was okay. Pretty much your standard 80’s slasher fare. As it turns out, the vague details I knew about the movie going into it (there’s a mine, and a killer in a gas mask) were basically the whole movie.

Okay, that’s not entirely true. What I didn’t know going in was that there would be some really ridiculous fight scenes during the climactic moments. “Unrealistic” is an understatement. It was almost like the actors were trying to see how slowly they could fight without actually using slow motion. I actually laughed out loud during what I’m pretty sure was supposed to be the high-tension climax.

Also, there was a lot of focus on this weird love triangle drama between a few of the characters. I’m talking soap opera level drama, beyond what most horror films use for character development. And the dialogue was about as clever as soap opera dialogue.

That said, the plot (and the twist at the end) was reasonably interesting, the acting wasn’t bad, and the background music was nicely understated. And I’d probably watch the whole thing all over if it were the only way to see the wonderfully adorable title screen again.