Scary Stories (from a Dark Allie)

This is a silly movie. I get the sense it’s meant to be silly on purpose (I mean, Perez Hilton is in it, after all…and, um, it’s called “Most Likely to Die"), which mostly works here.

This one definitely had promise based on its trailer, and I’m happy to say it wasn’t a disappointment. It’s got a good cast and decent production value and that shows. I’m glad to see that people are still making decent scary movies rated PG-13 or lower. I don’t think it’s the swearing or graphic violence that makes a movie scary, and this movie helps prove that.

I was going to rate this three out of five instead of four out of five, but I’d be lying if I said this movie wasn’t way more entertaining than any of the three-star movies I’ve seen recently. Which isn’t to say it’s a good movie. But it feels like the kind of movie I would write.

I’m giving this one three out of five, but I think that’s a bit generous. I have a soft spot for Sarah Hyland, what can I say? Who else here watches Modern Family?

I liked this one a lot. I feel like it had essentially the same story and overall message as The Neon Demon and told it way better. I know The Neon Demon was going for flash (quite literally at times), but I found this one much prettier. The camera work was well done, the music was fantastic, and I love the scenes where the camera flash looks just like a full moon.

This one falls apart a bit if you start thinking about the plot too hard, but it’s pretty good. The setting is interesting (an abandoned old mansion/asylum), the antagonist is creepy (again, if you don’t try to think her character through too much), and the acting is slightly above average.

Despite its distinct lack of Lauren Ashley Carter, I liked this movie. I realize it’s a remake of the Korean film A Tale of Two Sisters, but since I’m generally subtitles-averse it’s unlikely that I’ll watch the original any time soon. But I like Emily Browning (I have a thing for wide-eyed brunettes I guess?) and I liked this movie.

This movie raises a lot of questions (and eyebrows), but I found myself unable to turn away from it. From the straight-out-of-the 1980s soundtrack to the sudden, over-the-top violence, this movie is ridiculous and weird. And, you know, I like that sort of thing.

I think I have a new favorite movie. Or at least new favorite movie of the moment. Maybe it’s because of my newfound adoration of Lauren Ashley Carter. Maybe it’s because the movie is black and white and my favorite shade of pink.

Maybe it’s because I discovered that you can change the appearance of subtitles on Netflix to make them giant and bright pink (and you haven’t lived until you’ve seen subtitles screaming FRENCH LOUNGE MUSIC at you in bright pink).

I hesitate to admit that I tend to stay away from movies made in the 1960s or earlier. I don’t have a great reason for it, either – I finally saw a Hitchcock film (Vertigo) this year and thought it was pretty good, and it’s not like I’ve had many bad experiences that might steer me away from old movies.

I’m torn on how I feel about this movie. I think it’s got a lot going for it – an interesting story, a pretty terrifying antagonist, and familial drama as a backdrop. But the pieces don’t all fit quite right and it frequently feels like there’s more focus on being a dark and mysterious piece of art than there is on telling a scary story. I don’t like films that are artsy for the sake of being artsy (though I’ll admit that may just be personal preference).

Okay, can I just be a fangirl for a minute here? Not about this film (though I do like it), but about Lauren Ashley Carter (who plays Ada). She was awesome as Peggy in last night’s movie, awesome as Ada in this movie (though – oh, and spoiler warning – I do wonder if she’s going to get pigeonholed as the girl who gets pregnant by a close relative), and apparently awesome in real life.

Wow. I liked this movie way more than I anticipated. I watched it in broad daylight and it was still absolutely terrifying.